During Liberty’s last Cubicle Confession, she admitted to breaking/spraining/injuring a former classmate’s finger all the way back in 3rd grade. She doesn’t remember all of the details, but she’s pretty sure he provoked her. As I usually do, I gave Liberty a hard time about it – but then as I was thinking about my next confession, I realized I had done a very similar thing back in school, but much worse. My confession is about how I injured not one, but two of my friends. Now, in Liberty’s case, she was in 3rd grade, it was a boy she wasn’t necessarily friends with, and we’re pretty sure he started it – seems justified. In my case, I was in high school, it was two of my good friends, and they did absolutely nothing to deserve getting hurt. I wasn’t trying to hurt them, but I certainly did nonetheless. Take a look…

Bobby's Cubicle Confession

I kinda ran out of time when it came to Heather’s injury, and I was hoping I could explain myself a little more – simply saying “I pushed her off the stage” sounds a bit harsher than it really was. Let me set the scene – my high school didn’t have an auditorium, it had a cafetorium, which served as both the cafeteria and auditorium. That’s important to remember because there was no permanent seating, just tables, and chairs that were moved in and out as needed. So, one day we (the show choir) were rehearsing up on stage – the curtain was closed because there were other students in the cafetorium and we didn’t want to get distracted. As I recall, something we would occasionally do is push something through the curtain, towards the front of the stage or even off the stage (it was maybe a four or five-foot drop). They would almost always land safely on their feet. The goal was just to embarrass them in front of our classmates. Well, on this day when I decided to push Heather, I didn’t realize that the cafeteria tables had been pushed up by the stage (remember, the curtain was closed) – so when I pushed her, she had nowhere to land, and she crashed into the tables.

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In both situations, I was trying to get a laugh, not thinking about the consequences first. I’d like to say that I learned my lesson and I’ve changed my ways, but that wouldn’t be completely accurate. I still find myself saying or doing something stupid or hurtful just to get a laugh. When do you think I’ll really learn?

14 Hilariously Weird Injuries