All the Things that (Probably) Happened During Game 1 of the World Series

Somewhere, in an alternate dimension, Game 1 of the World Series is still being played. That might actually be this dimension; I'm not entirely sure last night's game ended. I remember seeing a final score in favor of Kansas City but, by that time, 3 days had already passed and a Blood Moon has risen high above the city of New York, foretelling an ominous tale for their beloved Mets.

Or at least that's what I think probably happened. The game was long so I decided to research all the things that (probably) happened in the time it took for Game 1 to wrap up.

1: Marvel announced 13 more movies while 5 were released.

If you watched Game 1 to it's completion you missed a lot if you're a comic book or movie fan. Marvel announced a brand-new Fantastic Four movie AND a new movie chronicling the life of every reporter that isn't Peter Parker at the Daily Bugle. They also released a film about the hero Hawkman, titled "Hawkman 2: Bird Flu (despite not owning the rights to Hawkman or ever releasing an original) and a film where Stan Lee rolls around in a pile of money while Chris Evans makes duckface towards the camera. The latter film was number 1 at the box office for 7 years.

2. Bartolo Colon discovers Fountain of Youth between 11th and 12th inning; fights crime

Mets relief pitcher, Bartolo Colon, has been the butt of many jokes during his playoff run given his unorthodox physique and estimated age of 134 years old. If you were watching the game, you'll never know that between the 11th and 12th inning, Colon actually discovered the Fountain of Youth. With he newfound youth, he decided to fight crime and was very good at it. He received a key to the city in every major and minor city in the world. Unfortunately, two days before he was to retire from the force (during this time he became Chief of All Police of All Time), he was defeated in an arm wrestling contest with a werewolf Joe Buck and was stripped of his power, forcing him to rejoin the Mets and lose Game 1.

3. Donald Trump became President and was impeached for unlikely reason.

The 2016 election took place and Donald Trump surprisingly won, unopposed (the rest of the candidates trapped in a time vortex after staying at Game 1). Trump led a very good presidency, even going so far as to soften his stance on immigration. Unfortunately, he was impeached after he passed a law that stated that schools were no longer allowed to cut the pizza during pizza day with scissors. This went against the 47th Amendment of the Constitution (the same Amendment that banned all non-cheese stuffed crusts and banned pants suits for both genders) and he was quickly removed from office.

There you have it! Those were all of the big events that took place during Game 1 of the World Series! If I missed any, feel free to drop a comment below!